Hellbent

Well, I suppose I should live up to my title. Last weekend I went out on the town and did some dancing in the nightclub with my cane. Two lovelies started dancing with me a little and as the iron was hot for the striking as it were I came to realize that I had BO. I had forgotten to put on deodorant earlier in the day. So I hoofed it on over to the men's room, took a leak, washed my hands. But then I loaded up my hands with soap and went into the shitter. There I commenced to wash my armpits. But now I was faced with the conundrum of rinsing my armpits. I looked around the pooper-stall and sighed. I flushed the toilet and thought of how kitties are very cleanly animals and only drink the cleanest water. That's why you always see cats drinking from toilet bowls. Besides, the bathroom was busy and there was a towel guy in the bathroom so I couldn't exactly rinse in the sink....

A little later when Gangnam Style came on I asked a pretty girl who was sitting down if she'd like to dance. Shockingly her answer was no. So I gangnam styled it solo.

Later, after leaving the club without any numbers, I saw a super-stretch limo out in front of the club. I asked the pretty girl standing near the limo if she was riding in it and she said no. I decided to see if the door was locked and opened the limo door. It looked nice enough inside, but I closed the door again, figuring I shouldn't draw too much attention. The limo driver, I assume, told me not to touch the car. Shortly after, he opens the door and a bunch of people pile in, including the girl that just told me she wasn't going. I didn't ask if I could join the party. Later, a friendly enough guy asked me how my night was. I told him it was good enough and that I'm glad I didn't stay in line for the other club and had wised up to the fact that it was a gay club (given the number of dudes). He said that's nice, that he was at that club. Maybe halloween weekend will go a little better.