Ralphis

Anyway, Britta left me monday and I've been moping around. I'm very sad and depressed and have no appetite. I still love her very much and I know she loves me, but the reasons as to why this happen are evident.

We were doing some fighting in the past few weeks, until the point where we wouldn't even laugh at eachother. Then monday, I intend to take her out and try and get things moving on the right track again and get the "I don't want to go out anymore".

So yesterday I go over there and sob for a while. We talked for some minutes, and what was depressing turned into something happy where we reminisced all of our good times together. It seem(ed) as though there is a chance to get back together eventually. I love the girl too much to want to lose her.

I'm very confused and don't know what to do with myself. I sit here and mope about and don't really want to do anything except go there. If I do, she won't want me there. So to make her happy, I'm trying to stay away. It's quite frankly a shitty ordeal and it hurts me inside very very much.

I've had a great year though. My mom was supposed to die, but she beat a horrible disease. My dad took my college money and gambled it away, then left. He now makes $210,000 per year and is living home again. My cat was thought dead for a week then she reappeared on my bed one night.

So to me, I'm hoping everything will turn out good like everything bad has done. I'm hoping that she'll feel the same love for me that I feel for her and we can forgive eachother. If not, this will hurt for a bit.