Dave The Daring

Yeah, the PS1 just couldn't do convincing tofu physics. One of it's few weaknesses.

Has anyone played ultimate doom on a Canon Pixma inkjet printer? I only played it on an ATM.

Tofu is literally a giant block of, well, tofu. So apparently zombies like tofu. He knew?

Same, but with Tofu.

I used to have nightmares about Jack Frost when I was a kid.

It'll get worse, believe me.

Saddening indeed.

It's sad that anorexia can strike at such a young age.

I'm not sure you could fit a camera inside a singularity, but hey, they're making them smaller and smaller all the time, so who knows?

Looks great, fat chance of getting it to run my crappy laptop though. :(

I played the first one years ago on the Atari ST. I loved it. Haven't played any of the sequels though.

One million bucks?! I asked you to play Eternal Doom IV, not Joe Ilya's Lost Maps.

Name your price.

A song about a fairground roundabout operator who becomes so impoverished he starts to resemble a skeleton. He takes advantage of his bony resemblance by gaining employment as a ghost on the ghost train. Unfortunately, he makes so much money in his new job he eventually becomes fat and is fired by the ghost train owner. He then returns to operating the roundabout.. Yeah, it was the 1960s, just go with it.

Are you subtly trying to insinuate Ogopogo doesn't exist?.. NON-BELIEVER!!

People definitely panic whenever I wear a bikini. Stupid judgemental society!

They weren't haggis flavour, by any chance?

^No, I'm not putting that anywhere near my mouth.

On closer inspection, it may not be haggis after all..

But it's haggis! I'm daring, not suicidal.

It was a Canon Pixma inkjet printer. Are you suggesting that we force an inkjet printer to have sex with a dot matrix printer just so we can have a version of Doom on a printer that has music?

Never tried haggis, never likely to.

If you're one of those players who refuse to play on anything other than UV, but you lack the required skills to play consistently at that level, you're gonna have a bad time. It's not called Ultra Violence because it's easy. Mappers are entitled to make their maps as difficult as they want on UV, but as I mentioned earlier, if they want to cater for as many people as possible, they should take the time to implement proper difficulty levels. It is possible to make an interesting map on ITYTD. Slaughtermaps are a different beast entirely, but to be fair, it says what they do on the tin. Granted, they're not my cup of tea, but I wouldn't call people who make them 'lazy' by any stretch of the imagination. In fact, making a decent slaughtermap takes a certain set of skills that I lack entirely. So to sum up, when you're implementing your hard-as-balls UV settings, remember the crap Doom players.. Remember me.

Meh, so long as the wad has a sufficiently easy ITYTD difficulty to compensate for my old man reflexes, I really don't mind how hard these young 'uns make their UV maps. Now if you'll excuse me, I need to visit the little boy's room for the umpteenth time today.

^Gorgeous as always, Urthar.