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Everything posted by Tobester

  1. Tobester

    Before you die...

    - Write an autobiography, and direct the big screen version. - Kill the following people: Dolph Lundgren, Doom-Child, Ralphis, Grazza (he's on my 'to-kill' list but i cant remember why, but i wont let that stop me), Fred Durst, Matt Dillon, Jeremy Irons, Eugene Levy, George Bush (both junior and senior), Isle, Phil Vischer, Mike Nawrocki, John Romero (why? Daikatana.), Mel Gibson, Gene Hackman, Steve Martin, Owen Wilson, Phillip Anselmo, Tom Berenger, Sylvester Stallone (wtf FIVE Rocky movies? jesus fuck), Johnny Depp, Martha Stewart, Buckshot, Canada, Frankie Muniz, Rose Mcgowan, Steve Jobs, Mordeth (FUCK RELEASE THE GODDAMN EPISODE ALREADY JESUS), Paul Verhoeven, Dylan Mcdermott, Neil Patrick Harris, Matthew Perry, David Lee Roth, Colin Farrel, Vince Vaughn (YOU FUCKED UP THE PSYCHO REMAKE ASSHOLE), Andy Richter (Conan has sucked a lot since you left please return), Toto, Rob Schneider (YOUR MOVIES HAVE SUCKED ASS FOR AT LEAST 5 YEARS NOW) EDIT: I also kinda want to meet Stephen King someday.
  2. So yesterday I woke up about 10:30 and the day started out normally. I woke up, put on my sandals, walked over to the computer (hereafter known as 'Suzie') and booted up so I could check my emails and see whats going on dwf.
    Computer starts up fine, I check the latest posts in the randomvg thread, add a few of my own, and decide, 'HEY! Lets open Doom Builder!' Fueled by Ola Bjorling and George Romero, I add 2000 sidedefs, mostly curvy shit thanks to DB's great 'curve linedef' feature. Evans City is starting to look more realistic every second. "Hmm," I think, "Let's go into 3D mode and align some of those crazy textures!". Once in 3D mode, I blissfully fly around my map until...


    I look over to Suzie, but I can see nothing. The problem is on the inside. Frantic, I get out of 3D mode and try to save, but the computer freezes before my mouse pointer can get over 'File'. I reboot, and the computer boots to the Winxp Welcome screen before it hardlocks again. Crying, I reboot again and I get a horrible message. UNMOUNTABLE BOOT VOLUME in huge capital letters against a BSOD. I reboot again and again and again, trying safe mode, safe mode with networking, safe mode with command promt, everything.
    Blinded in fury, I kill my brother and three homeless people before I come to my senses. I realize there's nothing I can do. So I go downstairs and plop in front of the TV for the first time in a long time.
    Hours later, I realize my brother is unusually quiet in his closet-sized room. Theres no constant Clay Aiken music coming out or fapfapfapfapfap. He's grounded to his room, so he's either sleeping or not there. I enter and find his window open, with a rope made out of bath towels hanging out of the window.

    <arioch> people actually do that?
    <tobester> yep

    I go downstairs and inform dear old Mom.

    <tobe> chris is gone, he escaped from his cell using a rope made from his unwashed jizzcloth.
    <mother> I'll warm up the car, you go get your asskicking boots on.

    We drive and get our buddy Fat Eric, who earned his name from being a 5 foot tall 12 year old 300 pound motivation for birth control. He knows where my brother is, so we get the cavalier into gear and pick him up, where he claims he 'escaped his room to go paint'. We arrive home and find a car parked in our spot, so we park behind it. My sister babysits occasionally, and the mother had come to pick up her child.
    She leaves. My car is not in front of our house.

    <tobe> hey mother, can I move the car forward 20 feet
    <mother> sure
    <tobe> get in the passenger seat, if im going im taking someone with me.

    So we get in and drive the 20 feet. But im not done.

    <tobe> around the block?
    <mother> *sigh* ok. Be careful.

    I drive around the block. I feel like an old person. When I get back onto my street, I nearly take off the driver side mirror of a blazer, but I get back safely.

    And that's the story of the first time I drove my car.

    1. nxn


      Sephiroth said:

      maybe u should not have used XP. however i do belive NTFS has jurnaling (a way to recover)
      i know ext3 and resier do

      What makes you so sure it's XP's fault and not hardware failure?

    2. Sephiroth


      just said maybe you should not have used XP.
      test your memory and hard drive. memtest.org is a good one. also depeding on the drive, most HD makers have utilities that come as a bootable disk. make and scan that disk

    3. Ultraviolet


      He neglected to mention that he cannot boot from a CD and has no bootable floppies compatible with XP (or with NTFS utilities).

      He can't use that, Seph, because he can't get to a place where he can use it.

    4. Show next comments  9 more
  3. Tobester

    Martial arts

    I don't need to learn how to kick its pretty simple 1) strap on boots 2) aim 4) fire
  4. Tobester

    Geek Annoyances

    The worst part about being a geek is hating everyone who isn't a geek and the lack of vagina-equipped geeks (which arent necessarily the same as geeks that are pussies)
  5. Tobester

    Most revolutionary/unique weapon

    The slingshot they used in the bible was pretty cool. One shot and Goliath was down. Beat that. playing with dolls is for homos and lil girls haha, ovum. Flak cannons rock. Unreal is gay and so is the spooge rifle. Never played turok, so it gets spared of my comments. See above, although in the Goldeneye Doom mod it was a lil yellow pistol that im pretty sure I didn't like. It's a cool gun ingame, but imho its a dumb idea for a gun. A hammer and nails would be cooler. It's revolutionary in the sense that it was the first real fire-and-forget gun, paving the way for lazy asses everywhere. I personally thought that gascan was cooler.
  6. Tobester

    Hastalavista, gay marriages...

    if a guy wants to marry a guy, he should be allowed to. imho, anyway. tis my 0.02 for a nice postcount++
  7. Tobester

    Doomers Pictures Archive

    ahaha mild mannered Scuba Steve by day, Scuba Pimp by night!
  8. Tobester

    Doomers Pictures Archive

    I don't do either of those things! Unless I read that wrong and you meant the other person.
  9. Tobester

    Most annoying commercial ever?

    Lol, I remember those old Mentos commercials were like that. Those were ok in their utter ridiculousness.
  10. Tobester

    Uhh...what was that?

    Sounds like the script to a verizon commercial. "Can you hear me now?"
  11. Tobester

    Kalashnikov mp3 player

    It sounds like a good idea, but some dick is gonna fuck it up for everyone. Walk down the street grooving to yer tunes and the cops think your a russian taliban terrorist from the deepest darkest part of alabama so they gun you down. Cop: Shit we just killed this kid and the gun wasn't even real! Cop2: It's ok, the mp3s on his player were pirated. Let's go have donuts.
  12. Tobester

    Doomers Pictures Archive

    I can. I'm a sexy bitch. And that background is sexy. So are teletubbies.
  13. Tobester

    "Firefox" 0.8 released

    Damn straight. Down with the man and his monochrome plan!
  14. Tobester

    Most annoying commercial ever?

    I hate the Pier 1 Kirstie Alley commercials The old broad must be able to find work somewhere else Has CBS decided to stop doing shitty made-for-tv movies?
  15. Tobester

    "Firefox" 0.8 released

    Never tried firebird, I've got everything I need in Opera.
  16. Tobester

    Robocop vs. The Terminator

    Isn't it Kyle Reese? /nitpick :P
  17. Heh, I'm just using some fucked-up description I read somewhere once. 'They cling to their mother's vagina not wanting to die waving their little arms in protest' blah blah blah :P
  18. Totally. Pro-choice is worse than Hitler, he only killed 8 million people!
  19. Maybe it's just me (and I dunno, I skimmed the thread), but I don't think its murder unless the kid has a heartbeat and can cling to the vaginal walls as he's being pulled out via shop-vac/wire coat hanger/whatever. It's a gruesome mental image, but its a whole lot different than aborting a kid who isn't alive yet (ie pre 4-5 months or whatever). If you consider 'abortion' to be stopping something before it has a chance to be born, that makes you a murderer every time you jack off into your hand. Or something. Heh.
  20. Tobester

    best monster ever?

    the langoliers scared the shit out of me when I was little. langoliers = cacodemons
  21. Tobester

    Fricken doom ressurection

  22. Tobacco has its hooks in too many people for it to be banned anytime soon, imho. Marijuana, on the other hand, has its hooks in so many people that its bound to be legalized soon :)