I don't want to sound like an edgy shit, but I firmly believe that nobody should be forced to live a life of sorrow and pain, especially at the request of others (nobody will ever understand this), but i can feel that just as easy as it is for me to love and appreciate everything, can be swung to make me hate and detest life, it's an odd feeling. above or below the bullshit? is there any reason to go on? maybe everybody would be better without you? it runs through your head like a race horse on crack. To make sense of it all and to justify your existence or the existence of anything is a task fit for no-one, don't even try. as much as I've thought about it I do not (and can not) fully understand what happens when you finally die, do you live some sort of second life? a flash before your eyes? what if you're living through one right now? this is the only thing stopping me, that, my love, and skateboarding i guess. sometimes it feels like the only thing you can do besides checking yourself out is distract yourself with hobbies, drugs, and entertainment, and even that gets boring after a while. sometimes it's better to feel sad than to not feel at all. So for any of you to think about, would your family/friends rather you disrupt the common "vibe"? or find your body?