Single Status Update
Confession time; - I have done nothing creative for the past year.
This obviously sucks, and frankly I feel poor about it, but at the same time I am a lazy motherfucker and it's easier to fuck about online / irl rather than do anything about it. Used to be I'd spend at least ten hours a week trying to better myself when it came to writing, but these days I doubt I've spent more then ten hours during the whole fucking year doing anything even remotely productive.
It's not good.
I think I pretty much broke myself rewriting my shit novel for two years straight, all the time kidding myself about what a monstrous task I was undertaking. Finally, it set in that I was looking at another two years at least of rewrites before I would be anywhere even close to finishing and, having stupidly spent all that time writing the same fucking thing over and over and over again, I had actually forgotten how to look at a blank page and come up with something new.
Dumb mistake, strangling myself like that, but whatever. Worse, now I look at what I'd been writing for all that time and have a paralyzed "Ugh, fuck that," reaction, close down the word processor and instead go to youtube to veg out.
Thing is, I really need to be working on something to make myself feel viable as a human being; this fucked up laziness, while being the easy option, is beginning to eat away at my self esteem and devaluate my my feelings of worth.
So, trying to figure out what the fuck to do about it. I'm asking how other people deal with being creatively burnt out / being a chronically lazy bastard and what the best road back to recovery is.
I think I good start might be to remove the internet entirely from my work computer, but I'm willing to try other less drastic solutions to the problem first.
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Some good advice, some less good advice. I think the main problem lies in not understanding the actual mechanism that allows me to zone out of reality and enter the headspace needed to start writing.
I have noticed that, as I become more aware of style / become a more technical writer, the harder it becomes to ignore the reality of hammering on a keyboard to make words happen. Hard to explain, really. If my technique for getting into the mindset for writing used to be the equivalent of daydreaming, then what I have to do now to maintain a technical understanding and proficiency is more akin to lucid dreaming. Keeping the imagination flowing whilst simultaneously imposing a strict framework upon it is fucking difficult.
Also, people who write in coffee houses are the lowest form of hipster scum on god's clean earth.
Keeping the imagination flowing whilst simultaneously imposing a strict framework upon it is fucking difficult.
Fuck ya it is, I find it's best personally to try to divy it up, I'v the spots where I'm hardcore day dreaming and times where I take my adderall to work out the workload of it all, I can see that would be really hard as a writer though. Maybie get yourself into a daydreaming state and jot pieces of whats racing through your mind, then take snippits and start working them together when more cordinated? the coffee place was just an example, quite bars are nice as well, grocery cafe'(where all the old people hang out).