Single Status Update
My cousin has a coworker / friend named MM. Two weeks ago, my cousin and I hung out with MM 3 times in one week. Then MM found me on Myspace and asked me to hang out with her alone. So I did, everything was exactly the same as it would be with my cousin around. We talked, watched movies and I sat on the oposite side of the couch as MM. There was 4 feet of space between us. When I left, I gave her a hug, because I hug my friends.
Then the suggestive texts and myspace messages came from her. They were lines like, "If I get scared watching a movie, can I snuggle up with you?" Clearly she likes me, but I ignored those sort of statements completely, because I don't want to be more than friends.
She asked me over again the next day and I went with. I gave MM 20 minutes of warning I was bringing my cousin, because I was hanging out with my cousin already. On the way home I told my cousin MM likes me. My cousin asked if I like MM. I gave my cousin a non answer, but in reality, I like MM better as a friend.
All of MM's stories and tales are negative. I don't want to get between MM and my cousin's friendship / working relationship. MM and I might both be single, but being friends is just better.
MM asked me over the next day (Memorial Day), and I said "No, I'm hanging with my family." My family / cousin live 20 minutes away from MM. I live 60 minutes from MM. MM guilted me into seeing her. She said I was a jerk for teasing her that I was 20 minutes away and not coming over. I felt guilted into seeing her again. So I agreed to see her, and again I brought my cousin, because my cousin said she wanted to go to MM's anyway even if I wasn't going.
Yesterday I didn't see MM (thankfully), she told me she wants to be more than a friend. Yep, that's obvious. MM said she asked for my cousin's permission to persue me and if it would be weird or anything. My cousin gave permission (oh goody). I told MM that in life I'm very indescisive, so I'd just rather be friends.
I elaborated that indescisive means I'm never sure 100% what I want to do and it changes constantly. So the bottom line is that she may be an adorable blonde, but I only want to be friends with her and nothing more. MM wants to be more than friends, she wants to give "us" a try. I don't want to give "us" a try. I spent the entire day via text telling her that she'll just get hurt.
She would rather get hurt than not try. I gave her heaps of reasons. Reasons that put me in a negative light. I lie, I cheat and I half ass relationships. They're all facts. After I got used by one of my exes two years ago, I really don't care. When you're into someone you'd find any reason to be with them for a moment in your life. MM is no different.
The girl asked for me to at least give it a try before I shoot her down. She's never been attracted to someone in years, but I'm the one person that perked her interest. Maybe its because with my cousin around I've been a great guy instead of a jerk. Not that I'm a jerk, but I'm just on my best behavior.
I still said no. I'd rather say no than maybe, cause NO doesn't lead her on like maybe would.
Then MM said I lead her on. I hugged her and hung out with her 3 days in a row! That's a little silly I think. Leading her on would have been groping her and saying you're the only girl for me, I love you MM! Then say... just kidding!
I caved, I'm going to give her a try on a date that is in another day. I have a feeling that it will either end messy now or messy later. I'd like to pick the end messy now, but she's not going to let me.
This morning I woke up to a myspace message full of dumb web photos that say things like: I'd rather have loved and lost than never loved. I lost my life playing your game, but I have two left. If you were ever stung by a jellyfish, I'd pee on you.
I had to reply to her: Pick your spots. Fools rush in where wise men never tread.
I told my cousin all of this stuff, and my cousin says I should still go for MM and give it a try. My cousin knows all about going for guys that just want to be friends.
This forum has been very helpful in the past. This forum also lets me vent, cause she knows myspace. Any suggestions on what I should do?
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Problem solved for me. This afternoon I went on myspace to find a big drawn out letter from her wondering if I'm still interested. I never was, but I sent her a message back saying that I just don't feel the same way that she feels about me.
That's it. Normally I'd have the balls to call her and tell her, but seeing as how she lives on myspace with 3,000 friends this might be a better way.