Single Status Update
What if, for just one day, you could have unlimited control of the reality around you? You could change the way the wind blew at a whim, or have people tell you what you want to hear. You had absolutely no problems to complain about, and the future looked good.
From about mid-March to April 8th, every day was like that for me; I had absolute control of everything. A decent job that paid well, strong & healthy relationships with everyone I knew and cared about. I had a college interveiw coming up on Apr. 9th, and it looked promising. I was meeting girls, intoxicating myself to fuck all. My blog and journal entries from this period of time reflect precision clairity over every aspect of my personal, social, and work lives.
The college interveiw was less than sucessfull; the people interveiwing me found me bland and vague. I was telling them exactly what they wanted to hear, but they were trying to push my limits. They kept reccomending beginner's music classes (which I realy have no interest in), and even my areas of expertice were not eenough to quell them.
And then yesterday's day at work. I had been awake since 9 pm the day before, working with a plain-old-dumb, blue coller woman. The job was to unload a semitrailer, filled with many different kinds of tires, and to put them on pallets, label them for their distribution, and finish the trailer. 3500+ individual peices. The distribution report indicated that, if we had say 12 of one model tire, that 6 would go to one store, 3 would go to another store, and three other stores were getting 1 each, meaning that the remaining 6 would have to be sent to a semi-perminant storage site (Non-Con Voice) to be hand picked by another department. Combine this with an overflow of dog food in Voice, unwilling transporters & Voice pickers who wouldn't make their production quotas, and a serious lack of floorspace, and you've got trouble.
In the end, we managed to pick only 610 tires due to the Voice and transporting issues. Quota for a tire trailer is 75/hour. It took all 8 hours of the shift, and the peices had to be divided between the two of us. Do the math, and you'll see that only one person can get all the peices.
I was fired today due to "lack of production & poor work ethic".
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The weed didn't help. It's been making me sick (come down with a cold), and i'm feeling more and more desensitized. I feel like the whole front half of my brain is a red brick. Need to lay it off for a while.
you know, every once in a while when I smoke that happens to me, I get this terrible allergic reaction of some sort and it lasts for about a week. People have told me that weed can't do that but now I'm pretty sure it was no coincidence.