Insomniak

I am an easy going guy. A neo-hippie with a shaved head, 1 week of growth. A chin beard, a regular supply of pot, vinyl records and a working turntable, Musical instruments without any knowlage of notation. I am slack; I pull my own weight, let people make their own independent decisions, do basic chores, wash my dishes when I damn well feel like it. I have altered me degree of perception to the level that I can comprehend the world around me, and manipulate it to my own bidding. I am the exploiter, the sloth, the zen master of my environment. I am become lazy.

Within perfect order, chaos.
Within perfect chaos, order.
Perhaps the only real constant in my universe.
This is the way my mind has operated sucessfully for the longest of time.

And then college life came and fucked it all around.

My life peaked back in March. I'm sure of it. Perfect Control, both real and hallucinatory, of my everyday life. I'd like to think that I still have that control, but things are starting to spiral out.

My Opinions on Dorm life:

-Being told to "Wash the dishes" should include washing them, rinsing them, drying them, and putting them away. It should NOT include washing the counter, washing the table, washing the kitchen floor, and vaccuming the carpet. If these need to be done, you say "clean the kitchen", and even then, it doesn't need to be done daily. 29 out of 30 randomly interveiwed students agreed with me on this.

-You should not have to buy your roommate beer if your friends, as questionable as they might be, come over and drink it and then don't tell you about it until you have to kick them out at 2:30 am because you have class in 6 1/2 hours. You especially do not have to buy it if said roommate has alcohol abuse issues (and not just in the
stereotypical college manner).

-If the shoes are clean, they may go as they please. this includes the kitchen floor, the stairs, and the living room.

-If a roommate washes all the dishes, including the ones you told him were yours and you'd wash on your own time, you should not be expected to wash all of theirs and the other roommates. They shouldn't have to be told twice, they know better.

-"Acting like a Man" should not include shaving your chest hair with a Gilette Mach 3 Turbo, wearing clothes made for kids half your age in the largest available size, wearing 3 different colognes, talking with a lisp, watching "The O.C." habitually, and listening to crap dance music they play in popular nighclubs. Your just asking for trouble with this.

-A lasso is made for roping cattle, not humans.

-"Dirty Skid" is not an insult; it's something you find at a warehouse.

-Just because you've been to Amsterdam doesn't make you cool. You have never smoked pot a day in your life.

-You can live without a microwave. Watch me.

-Manipulate your R.A., and exploit your roommates to the greatest lengths you can.

and now, your opinions, please.