Single Status Update
She's in Fort McMurray for the holidays, and I'm missing her already. I miss the way she offers me a cigarette every time I see her. I miss the way we talk about the strangest things, like her russian family, her saxophone, or dimentions for a TV Flat made of 1x3 with a door and 2 windows. I miss the way she agrees with me by saying "exactly" in a happy half-sigh, and I miss staring into her deep brown eyes for as long as I can.
But I don't know if she misses me or not. Does she think I'm a stalking creep? An immature jerk who wants to get her in the sack (not yet)? A leech of her smokes? An autistic dumbass who talks about his stupid music and his irrelevant problems? I'm realy not any of those things, but I worry alot about objective perceptions of myself due to past relationships. It's easy to tell people to "be themselves" as advice, but when what you are isn't exactly secure or attractive, you worry.
Everything was wrong the last time I saw her. I should've walked her home, I should've had some mistletoe or something. I should've bought her dinner. She's so nice to me now, but I don't know if it's caring, or pity, or or just her being herself.
Do you miss me, too?
just say you miss me
that's all I need to hear