Single Status Update
Ugh, I feel terrible.
There is basically this guy I have known since I was a small kid. He has typically treated me rather poorly, but for some god knowns why reason I still kept hanging around with him (largely because he is also the buddy of another friend of mine) since I don't have that many friends. He has often been very arrogant and rude (often disrespecting me and/or not giving a damn about my claims that he should care more about the things I have to say). But, I also have some positive memories about him since we (as well as some of our other friends) use to hang out since we were young, sometimes getting into some trouble togheter!
However, as of recently (and by recently, I mean in the last 2-3 years, I am 22 years old now) he has been more painfully arrogant and obnoxious then I have been willing to deal with.
For example, some time ago (don't remember if it was last year or the year before that) he called my cellphone late in the night (I had aleady gone to bed by then, though I wasn't asleep) and told me that he needed to barrow an HDMI cable for a PS3 console so that he and his buddies could play a game of FIFA.
I told him that it was late (somewhere around 22:30-23:00) and that I had already gone to bed and wasn't in the mood to go up and look for some stupid cable for him. He got mad and told me that I should do it because he needed it. I said no, and then I hang up and went back to sleep. Almost as soon as I had done so however he called my cellphone again but I just hang up since I had already given him a no. However, instead of just accepting said no he actually traveled to my house and started to beat on my windows to make noise and called for me. I got out of bed and talked to him.
He told me that now that I was awake and he was there I could give him the cable. I however was fucking pissed by his arrogance and told him that while I was now out of bed I wasn't going to give him the cable because I did not feel like giving it to him since he was so rude and arrogant, even going as far as beating on my windows to wake me up. This made him angry, and once I talked to him the day after he was still angry and talked about how I had ruinned/damaged everything for everyone.
That's just one example of the kind of shit I have had to put up with from this person. However, this is just minor stuff that doesn't matter that much. The straw that broke the cammels back happened yesterday...
After having recently finished (well, technically I quit) college, I decided it was finally time to move out of my parent's place and find a home of my own. There was only one problem: My nation's economy and it's housing market is completely fucked. For every home being offered out there were many people asking for it, and thus even shitty homes can cost a fuckload of money to live in. However, by massive luck I struck the jackpot...
The state owned a few apartments which it was giving out. Really GOOD apartments, and for a rent that was MUCH lower then the majority of what was being offered elsewhere. We are talking about a fairly large apartment with a sizeable living room, 2 bedrooms, a nice kitchen, a bathroom, and a storage. The rent was 104k Icelandic kronas a month. To put things into persective, I know a person who was renting another place of similar size for over 250k Icelandic kronas a month!
So yea, it was an AWESOME deal. The only problem was that its exactly because it was so awesome in the first place that for every apartment the state was offering out, there were over 12 people by averarge (according to what I was told, anyways) asking for it. In order to decide who gets the apartments, the people who request access to them have their names put into a lottery. I had no real chance of winning, but by some awesome stroke of luck I actually did, and thus the apartment was mine! I could not even believe it!
This is where my piece of shit "friend" comes in...
I was chatting with him (on facebook, not in person), and I told him about the awesome place I had just secured for myself. He then briefly mentioned that the place was so big that I would not need all of the space, and I said that I agreed and that I might very well consider renting somebody else (only a person I would trust, mind you) access to it as well in order to gain some extra cash (keep it in mind we are talking about "under the table" kind of renting, not offically and legally offering somebody else to rent the place with me). He then mentioned that he too was looking for a new place to live in since his current place was just a small closet, and as it turned out he even tried to get into some of the same apartments as I had, but unlike me had lost the lottery.
Me, being a nice guy who could use some extra cash offered him to live in my new place in return he would pay me for it. He said he liked the idea and that we would talk about this in more detail later. That was the end of that conversation.
At first, I was happy with myself. "I have secured myself some nice extra cash, and all I have to do is to let him live in that extra bedroom and use my apartment, as long as he fallows some simple rules" I thought to myself...
...but then I started to think some more about the type of person that my friend was. He can be arrogant and disrespectful, and also likes to drink with his friends. He also used to hold poker games with some of his friends at another bigger place he use to rent in the past and play for real money (which in Iceland, is illegal). Because of this, I started to have second thoughts. "If I let him live at my place, will he respect my rules and authority?" I asked myself.
So, just to make sure I decided to have a second chat with him, and contacted him on facebook again. I told him that I had been thinking about this for some time (note that this conversation took place a couple of days after the original one), and that I wasn't completely sure if I could trust him to be respectful towards my house rules (which weren't exactly very harsh in the first place. They basically just consisted of "don't behave like a drunken twat or hold illegal poker games in my apartment") and that if he were to live at my place, he would have to make it completely clear that he would.
He then responded by saying something along the lines of "Wait, you mean that I would be renting the place FROM you and not WITH you? You actually think you can create rules for me if I am paying you to live there?"
My jaw hit the floor by what he had just said. I responded by telling him that expecting to be treated as a complete equal in terms of actual owership of the apartment simply because he would be paying for half of the rent (and keep it in mind, that the only reason I expected him to pay for half of it in the first place rather then less is because the rent itself, as was explained earlier in this post, was laughably low in the first place compared to 90% of other places of similar size and quility. In addition there is also the electric bill and some insurances which he would not have had to pay for) was completely and utterly insane.
He then lost it and went on to hurl obscenities and insults at me. Calling me among other things "a sad loser, and a massive cunt full of sand".
I could not believe how ungrateful and arrogant he was.
Here I was, offering him the option to move out of his shitty closet of a home which he was paying 35k a month for and into a million times bigger and a better home for only a extra 15k a month, and on top of that I was also doing it in a time where the housing market is so fucked that 50k a month would not even be able to rent most people access to another person's garrage!
I was, by all standards, being extremely noble to him.
And what does he do? Does he say thank you? Does he appreciate the fact that I was offering to help him? Nope. He gets mad because he wanted MORE. And then insults me because he felt that I WAS BEING GREEDY.
What is this I don't even...
I have had to deal with a lot of bullshit from this person but this was the last straw for me. I don't want anything to do with this person anymore. He can piss off.
It makes me sorry that I have to write his however. In fact, the whole reason for why I am even doing it in the first place is basically because I wanted to let of some steam. I am so fucking pissed at this guy's arrogance and self-entitlement.
And the fact that this is a person I have known since I was a kid makes it all the more painful I have finally decided to dump him for good (I had thought about it before, but only now am I sure). I just can't take his crap anymore.
RIP old (shitty) friendship.
Now say something to comfort me.
- Show previous comments 5 more
If subletting is against the terms of your tenancy and cash gambling is illegal, you've probably dodged a bullet. Allowing him into your new home could have jeopardised your tenancy if he was as irresponsible and unapologetically self interested as you describe.
EDIT: Also, entering a formal financial arrangement with a friend can put a strain on the friendship at the best of times so it would have ended it tears at some point anyway.
quoted for great justice.
Agreed. I hope I will find someone willing to rent from me.
That said, I am worried that he won't listen to my "I don't want to see you anymore" claim. He hasn't really ever accepted no's in the past so I don't know if he would now. There is a solid chance he might continue to harrass me for a while.