• Content count

  • Joined

  • Last visited

About Pavera

  • Rank
    Senior Member

Recent Profile Visitors

3199 profile views
  1. Doom 3 was the first game I ever made a level for. I even uploaded it to FileFront. Those were fun days.
  2. I'm just so anxious all the time. I can never focus on anything anymore. It's rare for me to get a few hours of focus at a time without my mind wandering into something else. Even when I remove distractions it just feeds my anxiety and antsiness.


    Sometimes in my free time, I find myself just sitting and staring and trying to figure out what the hell I even want to do. Nothing seems interesting enough, and the idea of deciding on an activity is sometimes so stressful for me that it's just easier to do nothing. I can't bring myself to get deeply involved in anything I'm passionate about anymore either. It's why I almost never follow through on my maps anymore. And I can't remember the last time I played all the way through a game I really like, and it takes a LOT for me to sit and listen to a new album and really pick it apart like I used to.


    The funny thing is that I actually do have the time for these things. In between my house and yard work, actual job, hanging out with my wife, etc, I can still easily fill the remaining time with my hobbies. I even dream about it while I'm at work and get excited about the idea of going home and playing some more Witcher 3 or Prey or listening to that new album or whatever. And then, as soon as I'm actually there...all interest is gone. Why does my brain hate me? I KICK myself later for not taking advantage of that time.


    Does anyone else have this issue? Help me.

    1. Megalyth


      I still do this often. I used to fill the empty time with liquor, and to be honest I have given in to temptation a few times since I "quit" drinking. It can be difficult to muster the mental energy to actually do things, and I haven't figured out an end-all solution to this issue. Sometimes I just don't feel like doing anything even though I know I should be.

    2. Megalyth


      "As you get older... some of the things you love might not seem so special anymore... And the older you get, the fewer things you really love. And by the time you get to my age, maybe it's only one or two things. With me, I think it's one." - William James, The Hurt Locker


      This doesn't have to be true, but it's easy to let this mindset creep up on you. I think trying new things is helpful, for instance my wife and I have been going to karaoke lately, something fun and out of the ordinary.

    3. Anidrex_1009


      I have suffered what you have, although in my case it is more because of depression than anything else, sometimes I was lost in what I wanted to do today, because honestly, I had a huge list of things to do, but not a single one could make me feel happy. I did not really deal with it, however, I realized that if something special happened, all the interest returned. ALL.

      So in the end, what could I do? I realized that I myself could not just make things like me again, but I had a person who made me feel incredibly happy every time, and if I looked at it, all my hobbies felt incredible again.

      In my case, I got a girlfriend, and I've been with her for 1 year, and so far I've never had to deal with that horrible feeling again. You say you have a wife, maybe it is not as simple as I think, but sharing passions, tastes of love and experiences, usually returns a sweet taste to life.

      Wish you the best of luck, and keep going. 

      PS: Some music, movies or books could help you a lot, but I mean, deep music, deep movies and deep books.



  3. It's interesting to see this post in between all of these other posts talking about just how nice and friendly this community is. I think it's worth considering this person's viewpoint as a brand new member to the community. When I first registered on Doomworld, it took me nearly a year before I even made my first post. It just didn't seem like a friendly and easy place for a new member outside of the "old guard" era to start posting. There were long ingrained forum customs and in-jokes everywhere, many of which seemed very hostile or just simply "SA-tough" to me. I only started posting after a review for my first level ended up in /newstuff chronicles, and even that review seemed somewhat cold and indifferent at the time. After several years here though, I felt the community warm up a lot. I joined some IRC channels, started getting involved in some community projects, and just got to know the other people posting here. There was a long history of drama and in-jokes that I never got to be a part of, but that sort of thing really fascinated me. I eventually ingrained myself in this community, and I'm happy I did so. The majority of my online friends are from here, and I feel I'll be posting on these forums for a long time to come. With that said, the Doom community really doesn't have a warm and fuzzy exterior all the time. It can be very intimidating for a new member to open up a subthread on EE and find dew and Tracer arguing with each other for several pages. Scorned past members have fragmented off of DW to start their own unmentionable communities, based entirely around their united hatred for Linguica and Bloodshedder. Carlos periodically floods the pages with gore and crazed religious lunacy. Doomworld is cliquey, with tight groups of members doing a lot of their discussion on IRC and Discord channels outside of the forums. It definitely doesn't reach the level of "doominati" that some people complain about, but it can be tough to figure out which subset of Doomers you need to get 'in' with before feeling like you really have a place in this community. I could probably go on. I think the past year with DW's new layout and features have done wonders for the community though. The new interface is a little more modern, which is attractive to newcomers and gives them more ways to easily start jumping in and interacting with the community. Post Hell and Losers are gone, which I still maintain to be a good thing even if they were entertaining to look at sometimes. I always found their presence to be a deterrent for people like myself who can be intimidated by a forum that puts their idiots on display like a sideshow attraction. It seems like new membership is way up since the changes, though that could also have to do with the new DOOM game released just last year. The quality of discussion and posting has gone up, and we're seeing a lot more new mappers feeling comfortable to show their levels and get friendly help from our veterans. @Poorchop I don't know you, but please stick around. DW can present a cold exterior, but it has a warm interior.
  4. ANNOUNCEMENT: My wife and I are expecting our first baby, due in April 2018 -- right around my birthday!

    1. Show previous comments  6 more
    2. Philnemba



    3. bzzrak


      Congrats m8

    4. Marnetstapler


      If you're Walker, can his name be Crawler?

    5. Pavera
    6. Eris Falling

      Eris Falling

      Will he/she be born with a full beard?


      But really, congratulations to you both :)

    7. Anidrex_1009


      Congratz! Some really special thing you are about to live! 


      Wish you the best of luck, also, show him or her some Doom one day! Haha, jk.

    8. Voltcom9


      Congrats! That's awesome!

    9. Pavera


      Thanks everyone! We're excited. We don't know the gender yet, will find out in a few more weeks.

    10. bzzrak


      ...and then the baby be like DID YOU JUST ASSUME MY GENDER


      jk sorry

    11. Jimmy


      Pavvy's a daddy! Congrats to you both <3

  5. I'm uncomfortable with the phrase "funnily enough".

    1. Eris Falling

      Eris Falling

      I use it quite a lot funnily enough!

    2. 42PercentHealth


      If you don't like it, don't read it!


      Er, wait -- that might not work....

  6. a.) // comment

    b.) //comment

    a or b

    1. Show previous comments  5 more
    2. Ichor


      // Comment after a line of code
      //--- Comment before a block of code ---
      // Category Name
      Major, multi-line comment or code that I want to save for experimenting, but not actually use at the moment.


    3. Memfis



      not a.)

    4. Pavera


      Now my list styles have been called into question. Can't say I recall where I learned ".)" from.

    5. 38_ViTa_38

      a., not a).
      And I used //comment at some point but now I hate it.

    6. fraggle



      The reason I ask is because I get inconsistent styles between members of my own team. I prefer "a", but most of my cohorts seem to prefer "b"

      Use whatever your coding style guide says to use. If you don't have a style guide then you should write one. Stupid arguments over this kind of shit can literally destroy teams.

    7. fraggle


      & it's absolutely worth "policing" in code reviews, because have a consistent-looking codebase is actually really important. But you first need to have it decided and written down what the style is that everyone is going to conform to. So long as things are consistent it doesn't matter what the style is (usually, nobody is entirely happy with the style guide).

    8. Pavera


      The style is most definitely "a", cause I wrote the style guide. The team hasn't ever argued over this, though it's likely cause everyone just happily uses "b" despite my leanings. Maybe it's cultural -- most of my team is remote, in Hyderabad, and it's totally possible that they were taught to write comments that way. My original post is more out of curiosity as to what the usual standard is than anything.


      Anyways, our team is far from being destroyed over any of this, haha. If I'm assigned to a review and spot stylistic errors, I'll mention them. Though honestly I'm happy if I can get some people to write comments at all. I could probably push harder on these things, though I'm not the only cop on the team and I don't review every change made to the codebase. Maybe I should just revise the guide to use "b". :/

    9. fraggle


      If it's already written down and set in stone then there should be no reason not to bring it up. One way you can address this kind of problem is with presubmit checks that won't allow someone to submit a change if it doesn't conform to the style guide.


      Here's a really good article I recently read about this subject:

    10. Pavera


      In favor of a short response: @fraggle Totally with you on that. Consistent practices are important to me, and I try to enforce them when possible. I'm not the 'boss' though, just an opinionated senior US engineer that just doesn't always have time to push back. :P


      Without going into a long winded post on the inner workings of my team, I will say that despite some of these small inconsistencies between our programming styles I am mostly happy with my team's code quality and efficiency. They do a good job and are able to deliver requirements while communicating clearly with one another and documenting their changes.


      Good article too, I'll have to save that one. Maybe I'll share it with my team ;)

    11. stru


      Late to the party, but I've fought people over //this kinda shit. Not really, but my god //looks disgusting. //mightaswellputitalltogetherlikethis. 


      slash slash space is the only way to go.


  7. Have you ever just wanted to issue an apology to everybody who knew you in your late teens/early 20s?

    1. esselfortium


      I can relate to this. Looking back with embarrassment at how you've acted in the past is probably just a sign that you've grown a lot, though. All we can really do is try to be the best person we can be now, and try not to be too down on ourselves for old mistakes we can't change now.

    2. Memfis


      This is much trickier now that many of your embarassing acts are forever archived on the internet...

    3. silentzorah


      I used to.  But then I remember they were all assholes anyway, and deserved everything they got.

    4. Eris Falling

      Eris Falling

      If you're lucky, time will bury those. For example, I made some awful posts here in my early days* but newer content has (partially) left it to be forgotten. Hopefully.


      If not, sorry Doomworld.


      * and I probably still do!

    5. Major Arlene

      Major Arlene

      Facebook's memories thing makes me regret my teens every. single. day. luckily that also means I can erase my cringe day by day.

    6. SOSU


      I am joining that time frame now (? wonder if i wrote it right) so nope :P

    7. Pavera


      I've been thinking a lot lately about how much I've grown as a person over the last three years. Finishing college and joining society has really taught me a lot about myself, and it's caused me to reflect on actions and beliefs I held for the majority of my life. I think back on things I used to do and say, and sometimes it's enough to just keep me up all night. I wonder how many potential friends and acquaintances I've pushed away with my behavior in my youth.


      It's definitely not something worth dwelling on, but I just can't help but think about it. My goal is to not look back on myself in ten years and feel the same way again.

  8. Agreed. The Chasm is objectively an excellent level based solely on its own merits. Nostalgia need not play any part here. Some may say it is the greatest map of all time.
  9. so what happened between you and this renwick customer?

    1. Alfonzo


      You'll remind me to make Saint Alfonzo's Darkbase at some point in the future, won't you? We can't let that magnificent beard of yours lose out on a Scotch rendition of The Trio.

  10. Awesome! Thanks for the great writeup, glad you had fun. I also love that opening section. Always wanted to do a setup like that, with barrels taking care of most of your work for you. Also, yeah that last third of the map is really supposed to be a wind down of sorts. I like maps that climax somewhere at the 2/3s mark, with your victory rewarding you with some satisfying burndown time. That's exactly what I was going for here, with the long row of zombies to melt with your new prize. Anyways, still gotta upload the fixed version. Thanks again!
  11. Haha, thanks. I came up with it in my head while I was writing the OP. Just wanted to have some fluffy backdrop for the map's description :P It's not meant to be human waste though! More nuclear waste disposal type stuff I guess...
  12. Thanks for the demos. I'll have to fix those pesky lines! Thanks for finding that. Glad you guys had fun. Maybe the invuln makes that encounter too easy... We'll see, maybe I'll patch it out ;)
  13. Hi everyone. I'm back today to bring you another map I've been incubating for several months. Today I bring you a single level for Doom 2, slotted on MAP08. It requires at least a limit removing port, but is otherwise created in Doom 2 Format. This is my take on a pure tech-base styled map, and it utilizes only stock Doom 2 resources to create its aesthetic. This map has all difficulty settings implemented, with minor changes introducing newer challenges at higher levels. It's balanced around stock Doom gameplay, but please enjoy it any way you please! Hope you guys have fun. Waste Abandonment Scour the corroded and desolate halls of abandoned waste. Rusted, leaky barrels of toxicity are your only friends here. The acidic stench of nuclear pollution fills the air as the demonic mother-lode awaits your challenge. Will you survive?
  14. I love maps that give me satisfying clumps of low tier monsters to pummel with rockets or plasma. It's an easy and satisfying quick win that can create a fun and climactic moment out of any otherwise mundane level. Nothing more satisfying in Doom than seeing all those lowbie gibs careening outward from my viewport. Lovely.