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niguel

now this pisses me off...

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Me and my only friend's friendship is very very near the end. She had a girlfriend before and we werent doing stuff together that often anymore. they broke up and we were the best friends again. now he was in some baptising jesus camp and he got a new girlfriend there (who looks like a freak IMHO).

i talked to my friend some day after the camp and he said he's going to stop their relationship (we even talked about how ugly she is bwahaha).

Now i cant get the question "What the fuck is wrong with him" outta my head. He is still in love with the first girlfriend (but they are still friends and he meets her alot, but my friend has told me about how he tries to get her back). why the fuck is back together with the freak?? why is he so desperate of having a girlfriend?

im so tired of him promising that we are going to out tomorrow then he tells me something like: "im having this girlfriend and she wants this and she wants that so i cant go out today". now fuck off dude, if you just knew how you like licking ass!

And also a very disturbing thing is that he has proved that im not his best friend anymore. what the fuck, we have known each other as long as we have been alive, 15 fucking years!

thanks

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I'm sorry to hear you're having a rough time of it. The best thing you can do is just be supportive to your friend. I know it's miserable, but confronting him on the issue may cause a fight that will end it.

People go through phases in their lives, and sometimes they are temporary, and sometimes they are something more major just beginning to bloom.

I know you miss your friend, but you might consider spending more time with other friends while your pal figures out where his priorities lie.

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Being a young kid means that many things are confusing, so they constantly try to grasp something that is solid that they can hold onto.

which is of course why so many big companies get rich.. cashing in on insecure youth..

oh well..

I'm sad now.. I need someone.

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Let him do what he will do. Trying to stop him will probably only sever your friendship further. And sorry to say man, but life long best friends don't always last. You're young and its a hard lesson to learn, but you should take into consideration all of the possibilities. So you not like his girlfriends or are you just sad? I would tell him in a kind way how you feel, being pissed off will only push him away. . . Best of luck man

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Meh, if he's gonna ditch ya for his woman, then forget about him. I've had freinds like that, who are completely incapable of carrying on freindships and relationships at the same time. For the most part it's a youth thing. They get involved, leave everyone else behind, break up, you're best freinds again, they get in another relationship and it starts all over again. More pain in the ass then it's worth.

Gahd, I can't imagine being in a relationship now and not having my friends to hang out with too. Loves great and all, but some people just can't multitask. I mean, you can't sit around with your girlfriend drinkin' beers and bitchin' about your girlfriend. Hell, complaining about your relationship is one of the best parts of being in a relationship. :-D

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Fredrik said:

E-friends are better anyway.

heh, there are advantages to both real and 'e-friends'. for some reason i keep e-friends far longer than real life friends though.

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I'll admit now that post confused the crap out of me.

Anyway, always look after... number 1.

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pritch said:

I'll admit now that post confused the crap out of me.


Heh, me too, but it was easy once I figured out that (in the second sentence) "she had a girlfriend" was supposed to be "he had a girlfriend".

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Unfortunately you probably won't beable to do anything about the situation without making it worse. As much as I hate to tell you you're probably better off letting him realize how miserable he'll be being a slave-boy to some girl, since when you have a girlfriend (or boyfriend in my case), they have a nasty habit of expecting every minute of your life and attention to be devoted to them. They're very obsessive (well, girls are, from what my friends tell me and from what I've seen. I've never had anything to do with a girl, never want to. Guys are different though, lucky for me ^_^).

Anyways, if you get all mad at him and freak out it'll just make it look like your jealous, regardless if thats the case or not. If he wasn't your only friend, I'd suggest spending time with other friends, but unfortunately, that seems not to be the case. So I guess it'd be best to try to occupy your mind with something else so you don't have to think about him that much. It really is true that the more you think about something the worse it seems. I myself have quite an active imagination. If something is bad, I'll start imagining scenarios that haven't happened yet, but are very bad and could happen.

Lastly, for right now, just be supportive of him and spend what time you can with him that he isn't expected to give to his girlfriend. If you get pissed at him and start arguing or something and don't endup friends anymore, then you won't have a chance of being friends once he gets over his girlfriend, which by laws of nature, will happen. "Love comes and goes," ya know? Just don't screw your friendship up regardless of if a girl is coming between it, because if she ends up leaving the scene, then you two won't be friends and wish you were, and you'll both be screwed.

Well I'm done playing the Doomworld Counceller now, so peace out!

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niguel said:

we have known each other as long as we have been alive, 15 fucking years!


I've got to say it. 15 years, there's your problem right there. Guys do whacky things when they start getting serious girlfriends. Usually involving treating life long mates like shit and then expecting them to still be there when the "love" thing falls flat, only to do it all over again with the next one. (IIRC there's a good example of that in the movie "Grease".)

Deal with it, move on. Do you really think you're both going to be mates, hanging and doing stuff all the time when your 40? Sure you may still know each other, even still be good friends (I hope so) but college, university, carreer, marriage, kids have a funny way of altering your life priorities. It's going to happen sooner or later so accept it. It's just that at age 15 people tend not to deal with these things particularly well. You're both at a stage in life where acting like an ass is an occupational hazzard. Hell, it's expected of you. If you or your friend didn't do it, that would be the time to worrry.

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Sounds exactly like the situation with 2 of my friends. And as per usual I have to listen to both sides bitch about eachother :P It's gotten a bit better now though, but they don't see eachother nearly as much as they used to.

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Treat lovers as friends and friends as lovers, and encourage others to, life is so much easier when none of the people you are close to has any priority XD

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I just go do stuff with whoever I promised first and only put priority on my girlfriend if I haven't seen her in ages (which happens too often...).

Lots of guys do get into all kinds of weird crap with relationships and their friends and stuff. I think I'd just be totally honest about it with him.

TIP: When you have a girlfriend, sometimes it helps to bring her to stuff with your friends. That can be fun too. :)

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I must be one of the lucky 15 year olds that knows how to balance out Friends and girlfriends and still maintain everything else.

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