Mr. Freeze said:

What do you call a white woman with a yeast infection?

Cracker with cheese.


Q: What do you call a black girl with a yeast infection?

A: Moulignon Parmesan

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Q: How did the redneck mother know her daughter was having her period?

A: Because her son's dick tasted funny.

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A man walks into a bar and bets the bartender $100,000 that he could piss into a glass 10 feet away without spilling a drop.

The bartender accepts the bet, and the man proceeds to piss all over the bar, the floor, and even in the bartender’s face.

The bartender, who despite being covered with urine, gleefully declared, “Okay, now you owe me $100,000”.

The man walks over to another guy who gives him $500,000, and then gives the bartender the $100,000 he owed him.

The bartender then asked who the other guy was, and the man responded: “I bet that guy $500,000 that I could piss all over your bar, and in your face, and still have you smiling.”

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Why is a redneck murder so hard for cops to solve?




Because there are no dental records and all the DNA's the same.

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Salesman: We have high quality and low prices. Which do you prefer?

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Once upon a time, a family of imps were eating breakfast. Suddenly, their little son asked:
- mommy, why was your bedroom door closed last evening?
- it's... - his mother stopped, puzzled.
- honey, we have to get it over with - said her husband quietly. - who else, at his age, still thinks that we're all being spawned?



(that's what I have in my head every time somebody interrupts a biology-esque thread saying that demons are supernatural, illogical etc. and there's no point in discussion)

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Q: What's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm?
A:

Spoiler

Rape.

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Q: What do a dog and a child with leukaemia have in common?
A:

Spoiler

They're both not going to see 15.

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Hans Lipschis, 93, has been arrested in Germany on suspicion of having been a guard at Auschwitz during the Holocaust.

He admits to working there, but claims he was only a cook.

Spoiler

I doubt that claiming to have been in charge of the ovens is going to help his defence much.

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Lisa has 750 friends on Facebook. A week later she adds 150 more to her friends list. What does she have?

Spoiler

Huge tits.

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Doomworld: Fine and morally outstanding citizens of the internet.

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Clonehunter said:

Two russianish people join a marathon.


And they blow it up.

Some lines just shouldn't be crossed, Clonehunter.


Sometimes, even finish lines.

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A little girl accidently walked in on her parents having sex, and asked what they were doing. The mother frantically reponded with, "oh no, leave the room quick, we're just trying to make you a suprise cake."

The next day, the mother finds the little girl licking the bed, and the mother asked what she was doing. The little girl answered, "I'm just licking the icing off the cake."

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Technician said:

Some lines just shouldn't be crossed, Clonehunter.


Sometimes, even finish lines.


heh

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I would tell you a joke about the intestine, but you might not get it as it's an inside joke!

Two men walk into a bar, those stupid bastards!

Three men are on a plane, they fell off.

Those jokes are bad on purpose.

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mrthejoshmon said:

I would tell you a joke about the intestine, but you might not get it as it's an inside joke!

Two men walk into a bar, those stupid bastards!

Three men are on a plane, they fell off.

Those jokes are bad on purpose.


I got the first 3 ones, but I don't think I quite understand the fourth...

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killer2 said:

I got the first 3 ones, but I don't think I quite understand the fourth...

It's sarcasm, the guy who told me them believed they were good.

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mrthejoshmon said:

I would tell you a joke about the intestine, but you might not get it as it's an inside joke!

Two men walk into a bar, those stupid bastards!

Three men are on a plane, they fell off.

Those jokes are bad on purpose.

To be honest, I didn't get any of them, until I read killer2's post, which changed my mind a bit and then I was able to get the first.

Nevermind. I'm no native English. Also I know I didn't miss much.

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