Exotic gourmet meat

What would you like your "beef" patties to mainly contain? Beef can no longer be #1!   32 members have voted

  1. 1. What would you like your "beef" patties to mainly contain? Beef can no longer be #1!

    • Horse,Donkey, Zebra etc.
      12
    • Jackal, African Wild Dog, Dog, etc.
      7
    • Water Buffalo, Bison, Wildebeest etc.
      21
    • Gazelle, Antelope, Muflon etc.
      11
    • African Rock Python, Anaconda, Rattlesnake, etc.
      9
    • Scorpion, Earthworm, Grasshopper, Cockroach etc.
      8
    • Baboon, Gorilla, Chimpanzee etc.
      10
    • Mouse, Rat, Beaver, Squirrel etc.
      9
    • Roadkill (in addition to any of the above)
      7
    • Poached game (in addition to any of the above)
      10

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Just a small "appetizer":

Water buffalo, donkey and goat found in South African meat products.

Mmmmm, yummy! Since it's increasingly obvious that in the ever-continuing, benign quest to provide everybody in the civilized Western world with quality meat products, producers will have to make do with whatever kind of dead animal they can find, and the days where the kind of meat stated on the package really meant anything are numbered. Yeah, Joe Sixpack. Thought that your minimum wages REALLY bought you wholesome 100% pure All-American (or proudly British, whatever) beef patties? Well, guess what idiot, they don't!

From now on, it could be just anything (formerly) walking on two or four (or more) legs or even stuff with no legs at all that ends up in your plate (or between two the greasy buns that you gobble down, whatever).

This is not necessarily a Bad Thing however, as you might get the chance to savor EXOTIC and GOURMET meat from all around the world! Who needs Kobe Beef and Angus steaks à la carte when you could instead have roadkill and poached Water Buffalo, Donkey, Horse, Jackal, Zebra, Antelope, Gazelle, Kangaroo, Wildebeest, Python, Baboon, Chimpanzee, Elephant, Dog, Cat, Rat, etc. all for the same, old, low price of processed "beef" patties?

So, what you'd rather have (not an exhaustive poll, unfortunately).

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I'm voting for apes. Maybe if Americans creationists started acquiring HIV through their burger habits, they will have a harder time denying common ancestry.

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Spare a thought for a "green salad" I once ordered in France, which turned out to contain rather a lot of tuna.

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Grazza said:

Spare a thought for a "green salad" I once ordered in France, which turned out to contain rather a lot of tuna.

France: there's your problem. I'm sure they added meat as some kind of protest.

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I've had Bison so I'll go with that, it's really good.

Getting tired of these stories. Really if you've worked in a food plant you'd know there's no way to guarantee that a some trace of the former order doesn't end up in the next. Plus notice this is always ground meat, so it's just them using the same grinder. I also wonder how much a "trace" is? If my beef is 99.9999999999% beef and a single goat atom, I really don't give a shit.

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Technician said:

France: there's your problem. I'm sure they added meat as some kind of protest.

uh, can you explain this joke to us europeans?

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TheEndOfUs said:

No cats?


Sure, take your pick: Cat, Lynx, Lion, Leopard, Cheetah, Puma, Mountain Lion etc.

And of course, I apologize for not including two redneck favourites, like Racoon and Oppossum to the "menu" but with just 10 options....

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dew said:

uh, can you explain this joke to us europeans?

It's a long standing joke around my part that the French protest over just about anything. I think it's the fact that France has one of the few populaces that actually achieve any kind of group oriented protest that involve civil liberties.

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I had a giraffe craving once after watching some Archaeology video in class..

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Maes said:

Sure, take your pick: Cat, Lynx, Lion, Leopard, Cheetah, Puma, Mountain Lion etc.

And of course, I apologize for not including two redneck favourites, like Racoon and Oppossum to the "menu" but with just 10 options....


Opossum sounds delicious, creepy little fuckers...

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Nice thread, not even a week ago I was sitting at one of our wholesale houses waiting for an order while this guy was raving about a trip to florida he just got home from and he explained had the opportunity to dine on some alligator he shot. The way he made it sound is that it was the greatest thing he'd ever eaten. I don't know how common alligator is eaten way down south, but I'd probably eat some and thus I'm upset that it isn't on the list.

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Quast said:

Nice thread, not even a week ago I was sitting at one of our wholesale houses waiting for an order while this guy was raving about a trip to florida he just got home from and he explained had the opportunity to dine on some alligator he shot. The way he made it sound is that it was the greatest thing he'd ever eaten. I don't know how common alligator is eaten way down south, but I'd probably eat some and thus I'm upset that it isn't on the list.

The guy shot the alligator illegally, so I'd assume that it would go under the "Poached game (in addition to any of the above)" category.

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Technician said:

The guy shot the alligator illegally, so I'd assume that it would go under the "Poached game (in addition to any of the above)" category.

I have no idea if it was legal or not. In any event, I could go poach a cow or deer, but that doesn't make it exotic. A bald eagle or a loon sure... Alligator? I honestly don't know.

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Quast said:

I have no idea if it was legal or not. In any event, I could go poach a cow or deer, but that doesn't make it exotic. A bald eagle or a loon sure... Alligator? I honestly don't know.

I think "exotic" is just one of those words that loosely means anything that's not common to your lifestyle. At least I use it as such.

I would classify alligator as exotic to me, as we don't have any.

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Quast said:

I'm upset that it [Alligator] isn't on the list.


Well, I have a "reptiles" category, though I only provided snake examples (which must be easier to skin and prepare).

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I've eaten an ostrich burger before and it was damn good. So... poached game?

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I once had a burger from this south african burger bar in Kingston (london) that had kangaroo and ostrich burgers. I went safe and went with wild boar which was pretty tasty. The girl I was with wussed out and had a bacon roll haha
Lols at the French jokes. You do know that they will strike at Calais when they see this thread :P
I won't vote for anything here as I'm pretty much open to eating anything that won't kill me (meat wise)

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cannonball said:

I once had a burger from this south african burger bar in Kingston (london) that had kangaroo and ostrich burgers.

I've heard ostrich tastes eerily similar to lean ground beef; it's a very red meat.

Lols at the French jokes. You do know that they will strike at Calais when they see this thread :P

I've got to be careful, I'm a huge Perrier drinker and don't want any protest coming between me and my fix. Of course, I'm sure France wouldn't dare impede on their only export.

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More votes seem to be going for "Water Buffalo, Bison, Wildebeest", I honestly don't see how that's exotic meat.

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I like hot dogs so most of those things would be an upgrade. :p

I wouldn't mind munching on some bison burgers.

Not too sure about scorpions and earth worms. lol

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No seafood option. I might fancy a bit of orca, elephant seal, dugong or sea otter - though it looks like I'll have to join the Hannibal Lecter wannabes.

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I would try, and probably enjoy, everything on this list, with the exception of roadkill, which I'd only eat if I was starving or in a survival situation.

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The most delicious burger I've ever had was Bison, so I'm going with that!

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