Well, the new call of duty is pretty laughable.

jazzmaster9 said:

Not if it's the Original Call of Duty :P

CoD had nothing on MoH:AA besides visuals, and it had that bs two weapon limit.

Just look at all these "Hold X to [insert action]" posts.
I can tell that Call of Duty: Advanced Warfare is on its way to becoming a meme.

'Hold X to pay respects.'

'Hold Y to fake cry.'

'Hold R1 to fucking facepalm so hard at this prompt that your head explodes all over the funeral attendees.'

Joe667 said:

DOUBLE POST PLEASE DELETE

Moderator presses "X". ;)

Guys, you have to check this out. The game gets reviewed by... Conan O'Brien :D

http://teamcoco.com/video/clueless-gamer-call-of-duty-advanced-warfare

Seriously, even Conan who apparently doesn't know ANYTHING about FPS games found this moment ridiculous :D

dew said:

Anyways, I don't see why it should be disrespectful. Is it because of a dead soldier? Yeah, I bet his relatives from the virtual future are appalled that his funeral is abused like this.

Press X to picket funeral

Press Y to yell "God hates fags!"

Avoozl said:

CoD had nothing on MoH:AA besides visuals, and it had that bs two weapon limit.

I love MoH: Allied Assault, but CoD 1 had better missions and level design IMO. it gave a better atmosphere and i felt more immersed in it and was over all more fun than Allied Assault (though Allied Assault featured the Italian front which the PC Call of Duty series did not)
I like the weapons limit, it actually worked with the realistic feel, again it helped the immersion.


...AND the Soviet Campaign in Call of Duty classic is the Best Campaign in ALL of WWII FPS.

Totalhalibut appears to think the game is better than earlier installments at least as far as the pc port goes. I haven't watched the one about multiplayer yet, though.

EDIT: Just watched the video on multiplayer. It appears that this game is actually very good and not as skillfree as the normal CoD:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=06xIb1Q_nD8&index=1&list=UUy1Ms_5qBTawC-k7PVjHXKQ

dew said:

Then you weren't pressing the X button enough.

Anyways, I don't see why it should be disrespectful. Is it because of a dead soldier? Yeah, I bet his relatives from the virtual future are appalled that his funeral is abused like this. Is it because of the patriotic symbolism of a US military funeral? Cross a border and that pretext evaporates. Is it because "contextualizing and trivializing" funerals? But movies have been doing that for decades, and worse! And speaking of context, you wouldn't bat an eye if that was a Mafia sequel. No, you'd expect to be a pall-bearer, because that's when the shootout happens. If this was a Metal Gear Solid game, everyone would be pissing their pants with glee as Akio Otsuka/David Hayter/whoever's the next Snake waited for your X button press to vomit pathetic hero speeches to Harry Gregson Williams' weepy strings.

We've already contextualized and trivialized funerals, so any moral outrage here would be pretty damn artificial and just for the sake of having an argument. Just call it distasteful instead, although taste is a fleeting concept. Or hilariously pretentious within a wrong context, like Terrence Malick directing porn. Or make an X button joke and move on.

I don't think it's the fact that a funeral is in a game that's the problem. The problem is that the funeral IS the game. The idea of "playing" a funeral is just ridiculously absurd. Having a scene where your character pays respects at a funeral is fine. Turning paying respects into a QTE is a joke. Next thing you know, you've got a minigame where you're a pallbearer who has to make it to the grave without dropping the casket.

The point here is that you're obviously trying to elicit an emotion with a somber funeral scene, but any attempt of that is going to be immediately dashed when you try to turn that into a game. Which is different than saying a funeral can't be in a game. It can be in a game, but it can't be a game in itself if you expect people to take it seriously.

Hmm, good point, although it kinda underscores my point. The funeral is not disrespectful per se, the clowns that came up with that idea may have even meant it sincerely, but it's in really poor taste. I can't imagine a valid reason for wanting to "play" that scene, perhaps other than to mockingly enjoy the cringe, but I can imagine settings where even "paying respects" wouldn't feel so goddamn stupid. Say, half-way through a GTA or Mafia game, which both have pronounced characters and just pretend to be serious.

In soviet russia : 'X' presses you.

To be fair, GTA San Andreas opened the door to useless crap crammed in the game that is so far removed from the actual premise of what the game is supposedly advertising itself as and pretty much killed the franchise for me.

Yeah, "Press X to pay respects" wouldn't seem out of place in a game that wasn't meant to be taken seriously in the first place, where the whole game is meant to be satire, like in GTA or something - hell in something like Saint's Row, you could probably have a who DDR routine for the funeral and it would still work. But in this particular case, while overall the CoD games are ridiculously over-the-top and silly, what with their jingoistic "America, fuck yeah!" attitude and everything, they're not intentionally playing that stuff for laughs, the laughter comes at how inept they are at crafting a decent story. So something like this in a CoD can't work because while laughter-and-cringe inducing, it was never meant to be. In CoD, if you're at a funeral, you're supposed to actually give a crap about it, the scene is meant to be meaningful to the player - which is where they apparently deliberately shoot themselves in the foot by adding QTEs to it.

Patrol1985:

Thanks for that link with Conan, best almost 9 minutes of my day. I couldn't stop laughing.

press x to be called a gay negro whose mother had sex with everyone

General Rainbow Bacon said:

Patrol1985:

Thanks for that link with Conan, best almost 9 minutes of my day. I couldn't stop laughing.

Glad you liked it. I haven't laughed so hard in a long time :D Conan for the reviewer of the year! :D

P.S.

The "cross the street" fragment was simply epic :D As was Conan's observation that there is a bridge going over the street :D

dew said:

Then you weren't pressing the X button enough.

Anyways, I don't see why it should be disrespectful. Is it because of a dead soldier? Yeah, I bet his relatives from the virtual future are appalled that his funeral is abused like this. Is it because of the patriotic symbolism of a US military funeral? Cross a border and that pretext evaporates. Is it because "contextualizing and trivializing" funerals? But movies have been doing that for decades, and worse! And speaking of context, you wouldn't bat an eye if that was a Mafia sequel. No, you'd expect to be a pall-bearer, because that's when the shootout happens. If this was a Metal Gear Solid game, everyone would be pissing their pants with glee as Akio Otsuka/David Hayter/whoever's the next Snake waited for your X button press to vomit pathetic hero speeches to Harry Gregson Williams' weepy strings.

We've already contextualized and trivialized funerals, so any moral outrage here would be pretty damn artificial and just for the sake of having an argument. Just call it distasteful instead, although taste is a fleeting concept. Or hilariously pretentious within a wrong context, like Terrence Malick directing porn. Or make an X button joke and move on.

I want to stress the crossing the border and context loses all appeal argument. Im not American, I despised the usa during the 2003 Bush illegal invasion of Iraq, I relished when dead us soldiers came back in caskets because they got what they deserved for invading a country that didn't attack them. I just wish somebody would mod this part where I can open the casket and take a piss inside of it. I don't play CoD for the Patriotic US of A 'Murica f*** yeah symbolism. Like dew said, long funeral scenes are nothing new. Didn't soldier of fortune 2 had a long final level where it was just one long cutscene of a funeral?

Actually the game play looks really jarring considering how cutscene heavy the game is. I've said this before, but why don't they just eliminate the game play and make 3D action movies instead when that's obviously what they'd rather be doing? The fact that there's any gameplay is just giving the watcher the freedom to inject bad acting into an otherwise decent film at their own discretion. What's the point of that?

40oz said:

Actually the game play looks really jarring considering how cutscene heavy the game is. I've said this before, but why don't they just eliminate the game play and make 3D action movies instead when that's obviously what they'd rather be doing? The fact that there's any gameplay is just giving the watcher the freedom to inject bad acting into an otherwise decent film at their own discretion. What's the point of that?

Because for some reason it still hasn't lost its novelly the whole "Wow, I am inside this game, look, I can look around the place and not much else" experience. Would you seriously call this movie "decent". Like somebody already said, it's summer popcorn flick quality at best.

Patrol1985 said:

Guys, you have to check this out. The game gets reviewed by... Conan O'Brien :D

http://teamcoco.com/video/clueless-gamer-call-of-duty-advanced-warfare

Seriously, even Conan who apparently doesn't know ANYTHING about FPS games found this moment ridiculous :D

The most priceless moment in there was when the drone swarm did the whole incredibly retarded 'let's fly together in a thick line and swirl in front of the players turret but not actually attack him whilst he picks us off'. Apparently they all took a hint from the sentinels in Matrix: Revolutions.

This is supposed to be 'advanced warfare' and the drone A.I. (I'm just assuming they aren't controlled by humans, which would be even more laughable if they were) is apparently straight out of fucking Galaga.

I liked how CoD went back to basics with a bit of Frogger. That road was very dangerous, obviously Murca took lessons from the Empire's safety measures by 2030.

At least they're doing new things for once.

40oz said:

To be fair, GTA San Andreas opened the door to useless crap crammed in the game that is so far removed from the actual premise of what the game is supposedly advertising itself as and pretty much killed the franchise for me.

Careful, that opinion can get you flamed in some regions. Gta 3 and Gta 4 are my two favorites... Very low on the "Bullshit-O-Meter". I revisit 4 more than I do 5, and 5 has only been out like a year.

Don't get me wrong though, I still really enjoy SA and 5. At least the bullshit they add in is fun to toy with, It's just a case of different strokes for different folks. I'm the type who likes to start the game up, instantly steal a car, and either do missions or just go on a rampage. All the insurance and car sprucing and character customization and whatnot isn't what I play GTA for. They did well in that way, though - The franchise crosses over a lot of stuff and always does it in a fun way that pleases a broad audience.

doomgargoyle said:

Would you seriously call this movie "decent". Like somebody already said, it's summer popcorn flick quality at best.

QFT.

Patrol1985 said:

Guys, you have to check this out. The game gets reviewed by... Conan O'Brien :D

http://teamcoco.com/video/clueless-gamer-call-of-duty-advanced-warfare

Seriously, even Conan who apparently doesn't know ANYTHING about FPS games found this moment ridiculous :D

This is not a review at all. It's is an incredibly obvious marketing tool and Conan played the fool well enough to help sell a product and it will probably be quite effective.

The fact you enjoy it despite your clear objection to the product being sold is a testament to the power of the marketing strategy.

Linguica said:

I enjoy watching Youtube playthroughs of call of duty campaigns, but actually play one myself? lol just lol

Watching call of duty Youtube playthroughs? I can't think of a worse way to spend time...

RUSH said:

Watching call of duty Youtube playthroughs? I can't think of a worse way to spend time...

Not if you have an entertaining LP'er and the best game in the series.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=p2ee4N_Hmgc

Soviet Campaign

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Hi2Gocw_nP4

geekmarine said:

But in this particular case, while overall the CoD games are ridiculously over-the-top and silly, what with their jingoistic "America, fuck yeah!" attitude and everything

Ghosts is the only one with that attitude.

The WW2 CODs, including WaW, are not.
In the Modern Warfare series, the British characters are the heroes and save the day. MW, after the initial bravado, nukes its American character and his army. MW2's villain is American and it has the Defend Burger Town mission. You play most of MW3 as a Russian, and when you're playing as an American you're part of an international team.
The Black Ops series is a James Bond on steroids affair which draws heavily from various Cold War myths and its main character kills JFK. It's actually a fun and interesting story, starting with the WaW campaign.


As for Advanced Warfare: well, I only played two hours because I don't enjoy it at all. I'm one of those people who plays COD for the campaign and Ghosts and AW are both shit (Ghosts bing slightly worse). So far it's the story of a shady Blackwater: But In The Future company.

I like games which allow you to pause a cutscene or require an input to continue. In this case, they could have replaced "pay respects" with "continue", but it made me laugh, so I guess that's OK.

We need these:

-"press up on directional pad to display map"

-"press x to pick up medi kit"

-"press y to open secret door"

-"click left stick to unlimitedly run"

-"hold right bumper to bring up weapon selection radial"

Caffeine Freak said:

the drone A.I. (I'm just assuming they aren't controlled by humans, which would be even more laughable if they were) is apparently straight out of fucking Galaga.

and

dew said:

I liked how CoD went back to basics with a bit of Frogger. That road was very dangerous, obviously Murca took lessons from the Empire's safety measures by 2030.

It seems Call of Duty is keeping it OLD SCHOOL. We've been wrong this entire time! :D

Quast said:

This is not a review at all. It's is an incredibly obvious marketing tool and Conan played the fool well enough to help sell a product and it will probably be quite effective.

The fact you enjoy it despite your clear objection to the product being sold is a testament to the power of the marketing strategy.

The above statement would be true if I actually decided to BUY the game after watching the bit with Conan. I think its effect is quite contrary and I'm baffled that someone would use such a marketing strategy. Video games are about immersion and Conan (who acts like a total newbie and thus seems unbiased) constantly exposes how illogical this game is (civilian cars still driving with war all around, having to cross the street when there is a perfectly working bridge nearby, the "pay respects" bit, etc.)

The video mocked the game more than advertised it. After watching the video I certainly don't want to spend money on it. The way it was presented makes it "Daikatana 2" to me.

Maybe I'm being old fashioned, but I think it's about time we step back and stop making so many "realistic" war simulators.