A salad is just a breadless sandwich.

[EraserheadBaby]

My frightening powers of observation have revealed unto me that people like to have pointless arguments on the internet.  Perhaps some of you have noticed this trend as well.  So here we go.

 

Salads are cold sandwiches without bread.  I mean, c'mon.  It's lettuce or some other green leafy for a base, tomatoes, cucumbers, some other veggies, and a sauce.  Often, salads have cheese, meat, hard boiled eggs, and bacon (which is meat but deserves distinction).  Croutons are not bread.  They are croutons!  Croutons are bread in the same way that statues are rocks!

 

I am not talking about tuna salad, chicken salad, egg salad, potato salad, or other "salads" that are just mayonnaise swimming pools for forgotten food.  I mean what you think of when someone says "I ate salad today because I'm dieting". 

 

BEHOLD!!!  A DECONSTRUCTED SANDWICH!!!

 

Exhibit B:

 

 

Disclaimer: What you are experiencing is a joke.  You are welcome to join in on the joke, but you must remember at all times that this is a joke.  My counter arguments may not always make perfect sense (just like a real forum argument).  We're just having fun.  Think of this as an improv parody of a forum argument. Due to the argumentative nature of the thread, it will have less "yes and" than a normal improv. I will be playing a maniac.

Edited November 21, 2023 by EraserheadBaby

[BGreener]

So…basically…

 

…A big mac is just a salad with bread?

 

Awesome! My doctor is going to love this news! But the drive-through comes first.

 

Thank you, Lynchian Flesh Baby!

[EraserheadBaby]

Just now, BGreener said:

So…basically…

 

…A big mac is just a salad with bread?

 

Awesome! My doctor is going to love this news! But the drive-through comes first.

 

Thank you, Lynchian Flesh Baby!

THAT'S THE SPIRIT!

[OniriA]

 

[Chow Yun Thin]

 

OK ngl, I do kinda want an In-n-Out Double-Double salad with grilled onions.

[Lila Feuer]

Stop making me hungry.

[EraserheadBaby]

16 minutes ago, Lila Feuer said:

Stop making me hungry.

As long as you're eating a salad, you'll be fine

[HavoX]

So, let me get this straight... a salad is a sandwich for herbivores?

[EraserheadBaby]

@HavoX You've gotten it crooked.  A salad can have meat on it, just as a sandwich can.  It's a matter of bread and perhaps organization, but that's a completely different sub school of thought. 

[Chezza]

2 hours ago, EraserheadBaby said:

Salad's are sandwiches without bread.

 

Them are fighting words.

 

I challenge your ignorant claims with this logic:

Each dish is an experience that differ significantly from one another. Here are some of the various compenents to consider:

• Texture: soft, crunch, chew, temperature, moisture
• Flavour: sweet, savoury, sour, bitter, spicy
• Nutrients: proteins, fats, vitamins, fibre, carbohydrates etc
• Appearance: colour, shape, consistency, shades, presentation etc
• Aroma: smell, pungency, freshness etc

With that said, applying these components to a salad vs sandwich comparison can alter the experience significantly, from a change of texture, added flavours, hunger quenching to even temperature and aroma, regardless if majority of ingredients are shared.

 

Another way to look at it... would Jim from accounting simply be the same if he were to not wear any clothes to work, being butt naked in public? No, our perception, including our feelings towards Jim would differ on a person by person basis. Some want him with clothes, some want without. He isn't just Jim anymore.

 

So to imply a salad and sandwich are no different to one another due to a change in ingredient does a great disservice to the respected culinary arts and achievements of the human race.

 

May your next meal come unseasoned!

[EraserheadBaby]

@ChezzaHa, I laugh at your pathetic attempt to shake my faith!

 

Texture, flavor, nutrients, appearance, and aroma can differ from sandwich to sandwich.  From salad to salad.  From soup to soup.  From drink to drink.  Changes in these parameters do not dictate the nature of the food. 

 

This is a matter of structure.  For as you said,

15 minutes ago, Chezza said:

 

would Jim from accounting simply be the same if he were to not wear any clothes to work, being butt naked in public? No, our perception, including our feelings towards Jim would differ on a person by person basis. Some want him with clothes, some want without. He isn't just Jim anymore.

 

The removal of Jim's clothing is comparable to the removal of the bread.  Once stripped of his cottony prison, Jim becomes a new, more confident man.  The Jim he knows he can be.  So it is with the sandwich, that once it has shed it's bread it is reborn as a salad.  We can all feel how we want to feel, but Jim is a different man now.

 

You have done nothing but strengthen my resolve.

Good Day Sir or Madame!

Edited November 21, 2023 by EraserheadBaby

[Skullzrawk9]

For discussions like this, I personally subscribe to the cube rule of food, shown above. As marked by #2, a sandwich is distinct from a salad. If there was a bread bowl or wrap encasing all but the top, then the salad would fit into #5. Otherwise, I consider salad to be in the same category as soup and cereal.

 

[EraserheadBaby]

@Skullzrawk9  A bread bowl is still bread.  Diiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiisqualified!  The bread bowl argument is part of the "a hotdog is a sandwich" school of thought. 

However, your participation is still appreciated. 

[Danlex]

I prefer to believe that a salad is a tortillaless wrap, because the relation between those too feels more close and commutative than the one between salad and sandwich, considering the fact that there's just way too many types of sandwiches where this logic wouldn't work (ham and cheese, PB and J, grilled cheese, etc)

[EraserheadBaby]

Just now, Danlex said:

I prefer to believe that a salad is a tortillaless wrap, because the relation between those too feels more close and commutative than the one between salad and sandwich, considering the fact that there's just way too many types of sandwiches where this logic wouldn't work (ham and cheese, PB and J, grilled cheese, etc)

All salads are sandwiches but not all sandwiches are salads.  Just like all squares are rectangles but not all rectangles are squares.  However, your point about the wrap will have to be taken into consideration.

[Gmg]

Want some cereal without milk Lmfaoo

[EraserheadBaby]

Just now, Gmg said:

Want some cereal without milk Lmfaoo

We all know that cereal is a soup.  This is indisputable

[LadyMistDragon]

This presumes that any collection of vegetables is therefore a sandwich.

[EraserheadBaby]

Just now, LadyMistDragon said:

This presumes that any collection of vegetables is therefore a sandwich.

No.  A green bean casserole does not a salad make.  Also, it is preferred, though not required, that something which once had a face has been sacrificed for the glory of the salad/bread less sandwich. 

[LadyMistDragon]

Funny that, I thought at least half of salads were meatless. And why aren't green bean casseroles salad? Because they've been prepared?

[EraserheadBaby]

Just now, LadyMistDragon said:

Funny that, I thought at least half of salads were meatless. And why aren't green bean casseroles salad? Because they've been prepared?

Salads are cold.  No one likes hot lettuce.  Like lettuce on a pizza shop Philly Cheese Steak.  What are they thinking?  That will get you shot in Philly.

 

You know, that is a very important distinction I will have to add to the OP.

[BeetBeardTheBrave]

2 hours ago, Skullzrawk9 said:

For discussions like this, I personally subscribe to the cube rule of food, shown above. As marked by #2, a sandwich is distinct from a salad. If there was a bread bowl or wrap encasing all but the top, then the salad would fit into #5. Otherwise, I consider salad to be in the same category as soup and cereal.

 

Does this make Burritos calzones?

[EraserheadBaby]

37 minutes ago, BeetBeardTheBrave said:

Does this make Burritos calzones?

I appreciate your inquisitive nature, and that is a very interesting question, but we have more pressing issues right now.

 

Also, who's a cute little doggo?  Such a cute doggo.

Edited November 21, 2023 by EraserheadBaby

[LadyMistDragon]

in other words, cubes are obviously irrelevant to the state of a sandwich, merely an incidental characteristic.

[EraserheadBaby]

2 minutes ago, LadyMistDragon said:

in other words, cubes are obviously irrelevant to the state of a sandwich, merely an incidental characteristic.

Yes, because as we all know, the grinder is the best sandwich, and it's more ovoid in shape.

[OliveTree]

to the joker, its just a regular sandwich

 

[LadyMistDragon]

2 minutes ago, EraserheadBaby said:

Yes, because as we all know, the grinder is the best sandwich, and it's more ovoid in shape.

This message brought to you by Judas Priest.

[EraserheadBaby]

Just now, LadyMistDragon said:

This message brought to you by Judas Priest.

I wanted to respond with a picture of Peter Griffin at the grinder glory hole.  So I impulsively googled that and immediately regretted it.

[Plerb]

Soup is just a sandwich without the milk.

[dweltstorm]

how are croutons not bread? they're made of bread