IMJack

We have all seen the retarded shit that ends up in Post Hell, but what does it take to become a SomethingAwful, Weekend Web post?

OK, I made a blog about this a long time ago. I had confirmation today that I would have my passport in time so here it goes:

• January the 17th, 7:29pm: Arrival at San Jose.
  
• January the 22th, 7:43pm: Arrival at Chicago.
  
• February the 1st, 6:05pm: Departure back to Paris.
  

http://www.esconline.org/

I am staggered by the uselessness of some people.

Ugh, just discovered that WITH a curve, I got a 50 on my first Calculus test...let the rain fall, I say.

I'm also 308 bucks poorer now that I had to pay my apartment rent...guess it's time to get my ass in gear and find a job (even if that means working at McDonald's again).

Gotta compile my shopping list; at least I have enough for THAT, knowing how little I need right now.

On the up side, only 2 more days until I turn 19...but that's still 2 more years away before I graduate out of these "dry" apartments :(

Gotta finish that shopping list.

Turns out I had more to do today than I originally thought; had some reading for history to do, so I read that chapter (excruciatingly), and read another chapter for my Freshman Interest group; found out I had missed a chapter last week, but so what? The class in itself teaches nothing more the college success tips, which anybody with half a brain should know about before they graduate high school in the first place!

I also didn't manage to get my program done, but I just have one little step to go; I'm amazed I got as far as I did today. Just gotta figure the calcluations for my amortization table, use a loop to output the table on the screen, and I'm done.

Talked to my mom online a little while ago, and I may be getting a webcam this XMas. Joy...now I can take naked pics of myself and send them to any lamer girl who wants them...God help 'em. (j/k on the naked pics part!!!!!)

I end my day with the sounds of Skinny Puppy's "Optimissed". Ah, the joy of noise.

I just passed my discrete maths class. Rejoice! And one day on, I have beer running in my veins.

My parents found a puppy.

I would kill to be able to see, feel, pet, love this dog right now. But I'll have to settle for helping my dad scan photos of her and then throw them up online. I would kill a human being with my own hands, for a chance to see a dog.

Juniper. Shepherd mix of some kind. Found abandoned in some backwoods corner of Utah with her two littermates. I'm told she looks like a cross between my Misty and my Jenny.

I didn't cry when I learned that Misty died. I didn't cry when Jenny died in my arms. So why do I feel like crying now?

PUPPY PHOTOS!!!

Yes, I'll be at San Jose from 01/18/2004 to 01/22/2004. I have an article accepted at a conference. I sure would like to meet guys there so let me know.
And to think I didn't manage to get to the UK this summer. Anyway, plane tickets will get paid by the uni, wheee!

1. I've smoked fatter joints than that.
2. Ahh, it's cute.
3. Who circumcised you?
4. Why don't we just cuddle?
5. You know they have surgery to fix that.
6. It's more fun to look at.
7. Make it dance.
8. You know, there's a tower in Italy like that.
9. Can I paint a smiley face on that?
10. It looks like a night crawler.
11. Wow, and your feet are so big.
12. My last boyfriend was 4'' bigger.
13. It's ok, we'll work around it.
14. Is this a mild or a spicy Slim Jim?
15. Eww, there's an inch worm on your thigh.
16. Will it squeak if I squeeze it?
17. Oh no, a flash headache.
18. (giggle and point)
19. Can I be honest with you?
20. My 8-year-old brother has one like that.
21. Let me go get my tweezers.
22. How sweet, you brought incense.
23. This explains your car.
24. You must be a growing boy.
25. Maybe if we water it, it'll grow.
26. Thanks, I needed a toothpick.
27. Are you one of those pygmies?
28. Have you ever thought of working in a sideshow?
29. Every heard of clearasil?
30. All right, a treasure hunt!
31. I didn't know they came that small.
32. Why is God punishing you?
33. At least this won't take long.
34. I never saw one like that before.
35. What do you call this?
36. But it still works, right?
37. Damn, I hate baby-sitting.
38. It looks so unused.
39. Do you take steroids?
40. I hear excessive masturbation shrinks it.
41. Maybe it looks better in natural light.
42. Why don't we skip right to the cigarettes?
43. Oh, I didn't know you were in an accident.
44. Did you date Lorena Bobbitt?
45. Aww, it's hiding.
46. Are you cold?
47. If you get me real drunk first.
48. Is that an optical illusion?
49. What is that?
50. I'll go get the ketchup for your french fry.
51. Were you neutered?
52. It's a good thing you have so many other talents.
53. Does it come with an air pump?
54. So this is why you're supposed to judge people on personality.
55. Where are the puppet strings?
56. Your big gun is more like a BB gun.
57. Look, it fits my Barbie clothes.
58. Never mind, why bother.
59. Is that a second belly button?
60. Where's the rest of it?


Enjoy!

So I had to go into work for a few hours today (where I am now). It's not so bad. I finished volume one of the Ranma 1/2 manga so far. But it's like all I do is sit here...my co-worker is doing all the work. So why come in?

And wouldn't it be fun to be cursed like Ranma is?

Looks like I'm getting my Alienware as soon as I get back from QuakeCon. Speaking of which, I finally found a way to get my laptop to work correctly. For a bit now, it's been totally freezing up whenever an OpenGL program runs, and often freezes when a Direct3D program runs. To combat this, I originally took and put a pencil under one corner. But now...I've got it working even better. I take a CD-R spindle, place it over my touchpad, then place a world atlas book I have on the cd spindle. All while keeping the pencil under one corner. Somehow, this works. Then I just hook it to an external monitor, and I'm ready.

I've been working hard at getting ready for QuakeCon all week. And so far, my work's paying off. My skillz have doubled to trippled, and I've even gained a little bit of initial skill in StarCraft (taking on seven comps, oh yeah). I'm going to practice DDR this weekend...just incase ;)

TEST

A history of the Doom movie in the DoomWorld forums:

DooM - The Movie ?, begun by Renegade_Style on 07-02-01

On the Doom movie again, begun by Jeremy on 07-12-01

READ!!!!, begun by Jeremy on 07-29-01

DOOM movie, begun by bigbadgangsta on 08-08-01

thoughts concerning a Doom movie..., begun by Prime on 11-14-01

Doom Movie Question, begun by KingKill33 on 12-19-01

isn't a doom movie?, begun by MyStiKaL_BiOn on 12-20-01

Wasn't there a hollywood movie of Doom?, begun by Kai on 03-11-02

doom movie.. what do you think?, begun by HAMMER-STROKE on 06-03-02

Doom Movie, begun by RailGunner on 07-30-02

Any word on a movie???, begun by Affirmative on 08-18-02

Action figures, a new novel series and maby even a movie.. [kewl], begun by HAMMER-STROKE on 08-19-02

Doom, the movie, begun by WhileIM on 09-25-02

The Doom Movie, For Real This Time?, begun by Linguica on 09-25-02 *

if worst comes to worse..., begun by Ct_red_pants on 09-28-02

A very cool idea (in my opinion), begun by ricky_steel on 01-10-03

A Doom Movie?? , begun by MagnuM on 04-16-03

Doom movie, to be or not to be, begun by Gau666 on 05-22-03

Doom ]|[ movie, begun by pl0mk3r on 07-03-03

Doom 3 OST, begun by Nick on 08-04-03

Concerning the SWAT scriptwriter, as broken on Blue's News:
Latest Doom Movie Crap, begun by mewse on 08-08-03
Doom Movie Planned, begun by Baron of Hell on 08-09-03
Note that this news is four years old, and has already been discredited.

Does anyone know how i can stop all the pop up ads i get? I think i may have something installed on my computer thats doing this but im not sure. When im playing doom pop up ads come up and minimize the game. It gets very annoying, i delete my cookies every time i get off the internet but i still get more pop ups. If i have something installed where should i look? what folders? im using windows Xp. So if anyone could help that would be nice.

I was going to post this in the pop-up ad thread but by the time i clicked submit post it was already post-helled :(

Does anyone know how i can stop all the pop up ads i get? I think i may have something installed on my computer thats doing this but im not sure. When im playing doom pop up ads come up and minimize the game. It gets very annoying, i delete my cookies every time i get off the internet but i still get more pop ups. If i have something installed where should i look? what folders? im using windows Xp. So if anyone could help that would be nice.

I was going to post this in the pop-up ad thread but by the time i clicked submit post it was already post-helled :(

A wav by Torn

Feel free to contribute

Heh, only 50 more posts until i get a custom avatar.

THE ANIMALS DO NOT LOVE YOU BACK.

If America goes to Hell, I'm bailing to the Netherlands or Canada. Fuck America, fuck the Constitution and fuck hope. Why not, afterall? That's what the politicians have done already. The best part is that my bitching is entirely supported by the actions of the people who run the country. Who I do not vote in.

In my free time lately, I've been trying to come up with the meaning of life. For some reason, I keep getting 42.5, so somewhere, I'm have an error in my calculations...

In my free time lately, I've been trying to come up with the meaning of life. For some reason, I keep getting 42.5, so somewhere, I'm have an error in my calculations...

I de-adminned myself. Just so you know.

Sorry for spamming and being a asshole. doombunker.net is back up and novashock is on hold.

I was playing super mario brothers the other day at about 1 in the morning, and i got tired of dieing so i put in my game genie (to my new model nes go here for a pic http://www.tbonejones.com/nes_top.jpg) after i gave up i tried to get the game genie out. But it was wedged in there pretty good. Too tired to put in real effort so i loaded up my nes and just started to put in random codes. Eventually i thought i'd put in goatse for a laugh. With goatse entered into the game genie i loaded up mario and started to play. Monsters got stuck on the left of the screen and started following Mario's ass!! It was halirous that goatse actually worked! Try it!

Seriously, because I'm thinking of joining the army. I'm going for a non-committal physical next week, then seeing the counselor after. This is probably the biggest decision I've ever had to make.

Oh, and I'm not dead.